Infidelity has been a part of life since the beginning of time. During ancient times, and in some cultures, cheating was a part of life. Men would commonly attend certain events with their wives while other functions were exclusively for their paramour. These were functions where the wives weren’t invited. It might not have been commonly talked about, but it was just the way it was. Yes, there were jealousies and yes, there was always the chance of having a scorned lover in the mix, but it was life. Since the world began, there has been the affair, tryst, or infidelity and it isn’t slowing down any time soon.
Over time, cheating and the extramarital affair has developed and evolved. The need for secrecy and discretion has returned in full force and with it, the scorn of a discovered affair has had a certain ebb and flow to match the feelings of the times. These days, love triangles are in the news all the time and one of the leading causes of divorce – besides money – is cheating. The affair has continued on, though and it’s thought that with recent economic troubles, it is becoming more common than before.
Not so long ago, those seeking satisfaction outside of their committed relationship would start an affair through the office or get an escort when they were considering having an affair. It could be that this means of meeting people offered more discretion that came with these types of affairs, than going to a public place to meet someone to cheat with. If you wanted to indulge in a little something extra, you would simply meet up with that super attractive co-worker who had been hitting on you for ages and the office affair would begin. Nobody would say anything because the policies that have been long standing in the work place discourage co-workers dating and the chances that your significant other would find out were often slim to none.
For others, the idea of a workplace liaison was just too risky or there just wasn’t anyone around to start a thing with. This would lead to the hiring of escorts to satisfy the extra needs of many. Historically, the traveling businessman would choose to cheat in this way because the chances of running into the challenges of a full blown affair were slim. Since escorts are paid, they don’t want to spend time unless you’re paying them. This would help these men to feel safe and confident in the fact that they were unlikely to get caught.
Much like the salesman who takes his clients to a strip club, the use of escorts to entertain the traveling businessman seemed to be an increasing trend and in some industries was even expected and anticipated. This was a very popular way to show clients the very best time possible. It would happen with potential mergers, sales, and almost any other situation where a deal needed to be made. In many ways, hiring escorts just became a simple perk of the business world.
In a sense, office affairs and the use of escorts offered the best of both worlds for those who embraced infidelity. For many, these were options that offered a discreet way to cheat or have an affair without the fear of being found out. Those involved could get the satisfaction they felt they were lacking at home, and the home life could stay comfortably intact. No betrayed spouses, no arguments or unhappiness, just discreet and quiet satisfaction all the way around.
Of course, like all things, escorts and office affairs weren’t a perfect science. Anyone entering into infidelity of any kind knew they were taking a risk that could result in a total life altering breakdown. There was always a chance that someone would find out and it would get back to family members and bosses and this risk had the potential for serious issues. In the end, there were still the jealous spouses, the divorces, estrangements and issues, but cheating still goes strong.
It’s also important to mention that this isn’t the only way that cheaters would meet the people they had affairs with. It’s not uncommon for people to have affairs with neighbors, the friends of spouses and even people they would just meet on a night out without their significant other. In fact, many were unwilling to part with their hard earned money, and this led to the rise of the “one night stand cheater” lurking in clubs and bars around the world. In many situations where “couple friends” spend time, the chances of an affair or any kind of infidelity seem to increase with drug or alcohol use.
That’s not to say that infidelity occurs with every couple. That also doesn’t mean that everyone who works in an office with other people will have an affair. It also doesn’t mean that every person in the business world is jet-setting off to have a fling with an escort or hit a strip club. Just as there are many people who embrace infidelity, there are also many who do not.
Enter the internet …..
With the birth of the internet came new avenues for people who were looking for a little something outside of their current relationship. Many people discovered that they could meet others interested in the same things with complete anonymity. For the average cheater, chat rooms were the place to start out. This behavior would often be “justified” by the “cheater” because it was all really only talking. There was no real physical contact, which meant that according to many, it wasn’t cheating. However, for those who had a loved one prowling around in the chat rooms, this was indeed “cheating”. Despite these challenges and misgivings, during the infancy of the internet chat room relationships became more and more common.
As the internet became more complex, so did the ways that online affairs developed. Dating sites developed, so instead of having to look only within a local area to meet singles, people found that they could look further and meet more people. The added distance also meant that those living in small towns could just take a “work trip” to spend time with those they met and not have to risk being seen.
Personal ads had much more exposure than ever before and this encouraged more and more people to see what they could find on dating sites; they could meet lots of people they never knew before and the chances that anyone would know were very small. With single online dating sites came the discovery that you could “lie” on these sites and pretend to be something you weren’t, so many philanderers found that this was a great way to meet singles who they could carry on affairs with.
Over time, these meetings and affairs led to many divorces and social challenges for those who were embracing this type of infidelity. Those who met on the many dating sites would wind up developing deep relationships and these relationships often caused many to leave their existing lives to embark on new relationships with other people.
Others, however, chose to keep up with the online dating scene and found that the many they would meet online were willing to “date” someone who was married, older and even in a position to help them financially and this opened new avenues of dating that have since become common and even accepted in many circles.
Welcome to the “new” kind of online dating
As with any kind of dating, the types of online dating and affairs have developed into something much more specific. People now want to meet others who are interested in the exact same things that they are. Life is busier than ever and this means that there isn’t the time to meet people only to discover that there is no spark or anything in common. The digital age has encouraged growth in specific dating sites because of the wide scope of information and people, with the increased chances of meeting the “right” people all the time.
There are much more specific needs today and the internet can provide for all of these needs. When it comes to affairs, this has led to a married dating revolution, but has also allowed for those with specific tastes to meet others who are interested in the same kinds of things and be able to be confident in the fact that they won’t have the backlash of the traditional kind of affair.
The new specific kinds of dating include cougars. This is where a woman who is most often successful chooses to meet men who are at least 20 years her junior. This is a bit of a flashback to the days of office affairs where the young corporate climber would carry on with the older executive for some “benefits” that might include a better position, making more money, etc. Cougars and “cubs” alike can now meet people that they will want to date through a specific dating site called Cougarlife.com.
The idea of this site is to help facilitate matchups between people with this kind of preference, while ensuring that their current situations can remain safely intact through total discretion between the two parties. People who meet on this site are well aware of the expectations of the people they are meeting and are more than happy to comply with these expectations. Like all dating sites, there is the ability to chat with potential dates and see if there is a connection, which for many takes the “blind” out of first time dating.
Cougar dating is actually evolving into something much more than it used to be. Now, cougars offer the potential for benefitting their cubs, or the younger men they are dating in the same way that other arrangements can benefit. The young men who date cougars today are not just attractive arm candy for successful older women. Cougars offer extra perks such as financial support, travel and even the ability to climb the corporate ladder a little more easily than they would otherwise.
Sugar daddies might not have been very mainstream for very long, but they are rapidly gaining in popularity and acceptance. In fact, many younger women are actively seeking a sugar daddy to help them on their way to meeting their own personal goals. The average sugar daddy dating these days isn’t like it used to be when a man like this was much older and in the mob. Today, it has more to do with the time that many men have not had to meet a girlfriend, but want all the benefits of having a young, fun girlfriend. This desire has caused these men to be willing to offer young women benefits for offering a “ready-made” relationship without having to take the time to get there.
There is also the desire for more married dating than ever before. Wallets are being pressed thinner and thinner and people are finding that life just isn’t what it was before. The economic crunch is leading to more and more failed marriages and many of those that are surviving are struggling along. Partners are feeling over stressed and under satisfied in many areas of their lives. Many people who are married are looking for a way to get some of the “spice” back into their lives and it often doesn’t have anything to do with their current partner.
For these people, only an affair will do and if they are going to have an affair, they want to do so with someone who they choose. There are tastes involved and the need to feel attracted can connected to a potential date is still there. There isn’t the desire to waste time or energy on something that might – or might not work out and there isn’t the desire to have anyone finding out about what goes on behind closed doors.
Discretion in this case is essential, so what works for many people is the knowledge that both parties have something to lose. This has led to the development of the married dating site called AshleyMadison.com. Here, would be married daters can fill out a profile, likes and dislikes and what they are looking for and start meeting people who have the same interests.
Online dating is becoming part of society
Morality aside, online dating of all kinds is becoming more and more popular. While some of the methods aren’t embraced by all, the different dating preferences are being accepted more and more readily. Not all people choose to have an affair or married dating and not all people have special preferences when dating. Not everyone wants to develop a profitable arrangement when they are dating, either, but almost everyone out there knows that it can be done should they choose to.
In fact, you might be surprised that all kinds of online dating are becoming a readily accepted part of our society. For instance, some dating sites that focus on helping people to develop a long term relationship boast about how they have more marriages that result from matches on their sites than any other. It is said that almost half of the marriages in America are unions that started on an online dating website. The theory is that this is largely in part to the need to develop career and stability before finding the “right” person to spend time with.
Just as people shop for clothing, home repair goods and beauty products online, the trend is more and more to “shop” for people to date online. Part of the reason probably has to do with the fact that this is one way to almost guarantee that everyone’s needs are being met when dating. For many, meeting needs can help avoid uncomfortable situations that often arise in traditional dating scenarios and offer a satisfaction guarantee.
No matter how you look at it though, it’s very unlikely that online dating of any kind is likely to end any time soon. It seems that for many, the perks far outweigh the risks, so whether the focus is arrangements, cougars or married dating, infidelity and cheating is still a hot commodity.